Sobriety Series: From my heart to yours
Remembering our shared humanness
If you’re new to Sober Soulful, welcome! The Sobriety Series includes a letter with support for quitting a thing (whether substance or behavior), plus a link-up of provocative listens and reads. Access is a perk for paying subscribers. You can upgrade your subscription for full access here:
Dearest Reader,
This month’s edition of the Sobriety Series is less essay, more personal letter plus the November link-up. I’m taking a moment to check in for a few reasons.
One is that I know it’s been a difficult week for many. Regardless of who you wanted to win the U.S. Presidential Election, the online vitriol is…a lot. Living in Thailand, I’ve not heard a single person mention the election in person. But on the internet? Oof. I feel shaky just thinking about it.
All to say, my heart goes out to you. And my heart has plenty of space for you no matter who you voted for—in these times especially, that feels important to mention.
Please know as well that the “rules” at Sober Soulful are similar to recovery groups: no political commentary, no sowing of hate and division, no unsolicited advice or telling people what they should do or should’ve done differently.
There are plenty of other spaces online for partisan discourse. Sober Soulful offers a respite and refuge where we can remember and reconnect with our shared humanness. (And I know for a fact that there are beautiful, caring people in this community who span the political spectrum.)
I believe skillful speech unifies rather than divides, helping us remember our wholeness. I invite you to practice this with me, especially when it feels hardest.
After all, one of sobriety’s most precious gifts is being present, clear-headed, and able to respond skillfully in times of fear and uncertainty, grief and disappointment, joy and celebration. That way, we can show up more beautifully for self, others, and world.
I also want to acknowledge that Election Week has been rife with people normalizing and glorifying problematic drinking (win or lose). If you’re sober, this is another reason why it’s important to have politics-free spaces like this one.
Even if you aren’t sober, times like these bring plenty of messaging and pressure to make choices that can harm our body and mind. But whatever your recovery status and whatever your politics:
This is when we most need people—on both sides of the imaginary aisle—to avoid numbing out, checking out, or lashing out from a reactive, fear-driven place.
I get how tempting it can be in charged times to say, “Fuck that.” I’ve been there. I’ve said, “Fuck that” (and not a few “fuck you’s”). But wow, do I wish I’d paused and done things differently, because nothing good—and quite a lot of bad—came from it.
Plus, as my teacher Gil likes to say: “Whatever you do, don’t make it worse.”
And breaking your sobriety or repeating the same painful patterns—the ones that follow a predictable cycle and always end the same way—will definitely make it worse.
The last thing I’ll mention before getting to this month’s link-up is that I hold sobriety and recovery in an expansive way. The essence of what I write here is about being human and exploring how we can show up more beautifully.
With this in mind, the Sobriety Series offers support for quitting a thing (whether substance or behavior), and for exploring and shifting any unhelpful habits and patterns, including how we relate to and interact with others. Also our relationship to food, eating, and body—hence the new series on Quieting Food Noise (Without Ozempic). (Part 2 coming next weekend.)
So, if you’re struggling to stay on track with supportive choices post-election, if you subscribed because of the Food Noise series, or if you’re seeking extra guidance and heartfelt, no-bullshit support while exploring and shifting your relationship with alcohol or anything else, I want to make sure you know these resources are here for you.
From my heart to yours.
As always in this space, you’re invited to share your personal experience in the comments. (No unsolicited advice, spreading of hate and division, or political commentary, please.)
I know it can feel extremely vulnerable to share right now—especially in groups that cross partisan lines. I ask that you please honor the above guidelines and save any political commentary for other spaces. As we know, there are plenty of them.
Please tell us:
What’s nourishing your body-mind-spirit this week?
How are you taking care of yourself?
How are you protecting your sobriety or other supportive choices?
And, before you dive into this month’s link-up, please take a moment to tap the little ♡. It offers “social proof” and lets others know there’s something useful here. The more people become paying subscribers, the more time I can devote to Sober Soulful, which I consider my most meaningful work.
Thank you. I love you.
Dana
November Link-Up
