Can You Find the One Clear Line?
Plus a link-up for when you’re tired of the narrative and sick of being sick
Can we reduce ourselves to one line? Making ourselves smaller, more precise, economical. All that never mattered dissolving into…essence.
There you are. Here all along.
If only I’d known where to look.
If only I’d been still enough to hold my gaze.
If only I’d had the courage.
Silent. Steady. Cleaving away from ten thousand if only’s that promise to quiet the tumult and make things…easier. Make things…better.
One day.
When this, then that.
Then, I will feel and be something…different.
Except I don’t and I’m not.
Instead, moments before arrival, the destination has moved. The destination is something I barely even remember.
Another promise by another if only that had no right to promise anything. That had no agency to deliver.
So then, where to? Which of me shall I take along?
I do not know. I know, in the end, nothing.
Not knowing, I settle into self more lightly.
Not knowing, I remember more of the time that much of our time has little to do with what we believe is happening at all.
That it has even less to do with the roles we play, the titles we hold, the posts we post.
All that, really, is ridiculous.
A charade to keep mind and body from bolting. A collectively conjured distraction from the not-knowing-ness at our core.
Everyone realizes this, right? That we’re spending Earth School playing a strange little game?
That while so-called consensus may reveal many, many things, it sure as hell doesn’t equal truth?
They, like me, have simply learned to keep quiet. They, like me, have learned we’re not supposed to mention it, here. That doing so might be upsetting.
To the lull of what we call “my life,” “my family,” “my job,” “my journey,” “my healing.”
To the pretence of every concocted identity and story, hatched in the laboratory of telling and retelling—most of all, to ourselves.
To the absurd agreement that facts, belief, and opinion are real.
To the impossibility that everything is as it seems.
Better, I think, to leave it.
Better, I think, to stare at thick moss on trees and waves crashing against stone.
Wondering at their presence. Wondering what connects them, us, everything that is, everything that ever will be.
Dearest Reader,
Since posting the first link round-ups in this space, I’ve been on a collecting spree. Some of my finds are so good! But they are accumulating…and I have an aversion to clutter IRL and on my laptop.
So, in the name of tidying, organizing, and sharing good things, I put together an annotated link-up today.
It’s an eclectic collection for sure: A handful of listens and reads that counter stories we’re told and narratives we hopefully question but too often parrot.
Here’s what’s in store for paid subscribers after the jump (with a side of my own thoughts and possibly confronting commentary):
The role of sugar, addiction, EMF exposure, screen time, and mitochondria dysfunction in ADHD, mental health “disorders,” etc.
How technology, mold, and shitty water are hurting our health and making our homes unsafe
The undeniable link between ANY alcohol consumption and cancer
The unconscionable bullshit of “drink responsibly” campaigns
A hospital in Costa Rica, modern-day colonialism, and relaxing our vigilance around being ripped off
An antidote to existential helplessness
Widening the field of reality
Did I mention sugar, addiction, and ADHD? Be prepared for polarization on that one. Also a prescription for declaring agency and taking responsibility.
All that and my favourite book quote all week, for paid subscribers below.1