Oh my goodness, Dana. After reading about some of the things that happened to you surrounding your 50th birthday, I couldn't help but think of last Thursday... a day when I kept thinking "It can't get any worse!" First, I took my sister to a recommended oral surgeon to get a 2nd opinion regarding 6 teeth that need to be pulled. (My sister has multiple disabilities, so she isn't able to speak and resists opening her mouth for dentists.) Well, this dentist/surgeon basically didn't even try to help Bonnie. After seeing her and hearing her noises, he was afraid she'd "yell" and scare the other patients in the waiting room. I felt like I was in a bizarro world where my sister STILL doesn't get the care she needs due to her differences. Talk about frustrating! After that, my son (who is supposed to graduate from Penn State in May) discovered he's going to fail a physics course he needs to graduate. So, he'll have to take that class in the fall (and pass it!) before getting his degree. Finally, one of my great danes had been to the vet 2 times before they took x-rays and discovered that she swallowed a ball. A ball! It was about the size of a tennis ball, although we think it was a bouncy ball my son played with years ago. She needed emergency surgery. Thankfully she's okay and is healing well. I've heard the expression that things happen in 3's. Well, that came true for me last Thursday.
Your entire essay was encouraging to me, but I especially resonated with "What's Nourishing Me"... returning home to your babies (I ALWAYS feel that way when I leave my dogs), the baby doves, and the elderly woman who tells you you're beautiful. I just love all of that SO much:) I've been having a hard time finding my joy recently, even though I'm grateful for many things. I know this feeling will pass, and I know that good will come from all of it. It's just difficult getting through it. Thank you for giving me a few extra smiles today:)
Your travel tales sound very relatable Dana! I'm so glad you found something nourishing in the end.
I don't have anything useful to offer today, I'm sitting here worried sick and trying to distract myself - there was a big dog rampaging around our place last night and my youngest kitty, Tigerlily, has been missing ever since 🥺
Thanks for getting it Dana ❤️ After 8 hours of angsting and searching, she finally came trotting in the door looking slightly freaked out but still in one piece! Oh my, sometimes it scares me how much I love those two little beings...
Btw I think it's so symbolic that the earthquake happened on your 50th.... I definitely feel a sense of the earth moving under my feet during this life stage...
thank you, a fun read. I'm glad your home was not damaged in the earthquake....the stories of how the people respond, the helpfulness, the calmness are beautiful. I have not been through any natural disasters here but I imagine the people here in Mexico would respond similiary. Your experiences have some parallels with my first days after moving to Mexico with two suitcases. (gave away all cotton bedding and towels). Besides the heat and navigating the unknown city of Merida with insanely irrational addresses and street names, and oh yes, switching to metric and new currency, new Android when I'd had a iphone....what was hardest was the absence of anything I would consider healthy food (there are just so many tacos a girl can eat). Besides all that, what did me in for a while, were the synthetic sheets and towels, everything reeking of scented laundry soap, the mattress had a plastic cover on it which made it all so much hotter (took about 3 weeks to discover the tiny mites that the cover was protecting me against, a dermatological horror show). I had a total meltdown and fortunately was given some useful suggestions inside an expat Facebook group. I
The (VERY) scented laundry soap! One of our first errands after settling in here was finding an unscented alternative. It took going to a fancier grocery store but was well worth it.
I love hearing about your move to Mexico, Ellen! There sure are challenges and blessings in relocating to an entirely new place. It makes life feel more alive and interesting, to say the least... 😅
Wow, what a welcome to the second half of life, my dear! It sounds a bit like the old show Survivor, like where are the camera people hiding?
About the workspace. I, too, had a "I don't need anything" style workspace. Likely, subconsciously, I didn't feel worthy of, well, being my own boss, and thought I would fire myself any day.
I had a magical Feng Shui session with Dorena of House Magic, and one little suggestion about moving a table became the impetus I needed (well, there was also something I was inadvertently carrying around from childhood and maybe past lives impacting how I saw home spaces - gulp).
It feels GREAT having a workspace I love and that supports me.
Thank you for the warm welcome to the (potentially 😉) wiser side, Maria!
Your Feng Shui session sounds amazing. I’d love to do something like that, and I have no doubt about the powerful energetics of that work - the way we arrange ourselves and our belongings in space... and the unseen "packages" we carry from childhood and beyond.
One of the only downsides of our rental in Thailand is that it’s already furnished with way more furniture than my partner and I prefer (we love the feeling of SPACE). But having my new desk is giving me a small, private corner - a place where I can exhale, think, and create.
Dana, when I started reading this, I literally tucked myself deeper into the couch because even though they happen in a place so foreign to me, reading your adventures is cozy and touching. I love knowing that you are out there loving your life and that you aren’t suffering through the triggering classroom dynamics of Thai class. Thank you for sharing.
Aww... thank you, Julie. I have a feeling that if you were here in class with me, we would’ve been cracking up at the absurdity of those guys... and writing hilarious essays about them. All the hearts to you. ♥️
Oh man! Your cramped desk-work space comment is a huge nudge to me to make a change with my ridiculous situation. I am stuck in inertia on this because it involves moving a very heavy old oak desk down a tricky set of stairs in order to get a different set up so I keep putting it off. Reading your essay made me realize how great I would feel to have something more suitable for me. Thanks Dana.
Yes! Do it, Donna! (But definitely get help. 😅) I don’t know about you, but I find that “putting up with” these seemingly small things day after day has ripple effects that extend beyond the immediate matter at hand. Working at this vanity - cramped and using a stool on wheels that’s always threatening to slip out from under me - leaves me less patient when I’m writing and working. And even though I’m practicing to temper that impatience, it absolutely leaves an energetic imprint, no matter how subtle.
I'm reeling from the thought of a government warning its citizens against being "earthquake drunk." For all the flaws of any government, and there are endless minor, major, and epic flaws in any government, there is a kindness in that warning that shakes me.
What a lovely read 💕 I’m in the middle of this years Ayurvedic cleanse, and that’s nurturing my body mind heart & spirit. Haven’t travelled for ages, but about 12 years ago I had a gap year that turned into 3, and that’s when I found myself in the Catalonian Pyrenees at an off grid project. The peace of that place went deep into your bones. You got a lift to a little village then the road ran out, but you kept going. Those mountains and everything I met there turned lots of things around. It’s where I finished my Ayurvedic healing diet to heal my digestion and related symptoms. When I left I got a little a little train to logronio, and walked 670km to Santiago along the Camino. I watched the earth turn from red to brown, and I met all the different ages of myself walking towards me as I went. Up with the sun, asleep with the moon. Arms and legs moving this way and that. A lot healed and was nourished across those 4 weeks. As arms and legs moved this way and that 😊
Ahhhhhh I just loved reading this, Dana. In part because it evoked so many good memories from my four trips to Thailand, the last one now ten years ago, and all based in Chiang Mai. And in part because I love hearing about the internal workings of your own heart/mind and how you navigate them.
I totally get it how 'small' things become pretty huge, and how finally addressing them can result in some big shifts. In my little world, lately I have felt very weighted down with the responsibility of being the sole caregiver for an elderly dog (who is actually mostly a joy to be around, but still, it's a huge responsibility). I rarely get a chance to be away for more than four or so hours, and travel is such a core need for me.
Yesterday, I arranged for a friend to come visit Lucy (my pup) mid-day so I could have the entire day to myself. I took a road trip to Taos, NM -- not super far, but far enough that it feels like an adventure to me. Followed my own rhythm, treated myself to breakfast, took a long walk to the Hanuman Temple (such a cool place!), had lunch with friends, took another long walk through some wetlands and saw amazing birds. It was eight hours away, and it was just the medicine I needed.
Thank you so much for being here, Maia. I love knowing that there are people (like you!) reading who have been here and already get the spirit of this place.
And my heart goes out to you and Lucy! Something about caring for sick and elderly animals brings so much beauty and grief to the surface for me. It’s as though they are a reflection of life for all of us - immediate and real, without veils or filters or stories. And being the sole caretaker for an elderly dog sounds both heart-expanding and heartbreaking. Sending love to you both, and wishes for you to take breathers and beautiful adventures whenever you can and it feels most nourishing and needed. xo
Dana, ooo how I love this; you’ve detailed perfectly, and with such perfect rhythm, how you got to “exit sooner.” I so envy your easeful life in Chiang Mai; such a contrast from our f**ked up life in the U.S. right now. And the calm words of advice to citizens from the Thai government!
I loved reading this, Dana. All of it touched me. Especially the Mama Dove. I welled up a bit reading that. Last summer I had a Cardinal nest in my favorite Japanese Maple tree in my yard. The Mama was so sweet in tending to her nest. I watched daily, as closely as she would allow. The hatchlings were a complete delight to witness. My family left on a week vacation and when we returned, they had taken flight. There is a bright red cardinal that frequents my yard (pretty much daily) and I’ve convinced myself that he is one of the hatchlings, returning to his first home. 🪹
The memory of that is what is nourishing me today. Thank you for sparking that back up, Dana.
Also - this sentence:
“I settled into simplicity and rested from choice.”
My birthday is tomorrow and I will enter the first day of my 47th year resting from choice. I stared at that sentence for a few minutes and really took in how it landed for me. The use of the word “rested” in place of /instead of “resisted” calmed my whole nervous system. 🙏🏼 Thank you.
I love hearing about your returned hatchling - I find that animals stir such strong and immediate emotions in me.
And wishing you a beautiful, beautiful birthday! Resting from choice sounds like the perfect way to begin your 47th year. In Chinese Medicine, we encourage resting from choice during times of transition - keeping things simple, freeing up space.
Sending love and birthday blessings to you, Allison. ❤️
Oh my goodness, Dana. After reading about some of the things that happened to you surrounding your 50th birthday, I couldn't help but think of last Thursday... a day when I kept thinking "It can't get any worse!" First, I took my sister to a recommended oral surgeon to get a 2nd opinion regarding 6 teeth that need to be pulled. (My sister has multiple disabilities, so she isn't able to speak and resists opening her mouth for dentists.) Well, this dentist/surgeon basically didn't even try to help Bonnie. After seeing her and hearing her noises, he was afraid she'd "yell" and scare the other patients in the waiting room. I felt like I was in a bizarro world where my sister STILL doesn't get the care she needs due to her differences. Talk about frustrating! After that, my son (who is supposed to graduate from Penn State in May) discovered he's going to fail a physics course he needs to graduate. So, he'll have to take that class in the fall (and pass it!) before getting his degree. Finally, one of my great danes had been to the vet 2 times before they took x-rays and discovered that she swallowed a ball. A ball! It was about the size of a tennis ball, although we think it was a bouncy ball my son played with years ago. She needed emergency surgery. Thankfully she's okay and is healing well. I've heard the expression that things happen in 3's. Well, that came true for me last Thursday.
Your entire essay was encouraging to me, but I especially resonated with "What's Nourishing Me"... returning home to your babies (I ALWAYS feel that way when I leave my dogs), the baby doves, and the elderly woman who tells you you're beautiful. I just love all of that SO much:) I've been having a hard time finding my joy recently, even though I'm grateful for many things. I know this feeling will pass, and I know that good will come from all of it. It's just difficult getting through it. Thank you for giving me a few extra smiles today:)
Oh my goodness, what a day you had! So glad your great dane is okay. Sending heart-sourced gratitude to you - and wishes for joy and serenity. ♥️
Your travel tales sound very relatable Dana! I'm so glad you found something nourishing in the end.
I don't have anything useful to offer today, I'm sitting here worried sick and trying to distract myself - there was a big dog rampaging around our place last night and my youngest kitty, Tigerlily, has been missing ever since 🥺
Oh, my heart goes out to you, Vicki! Sending love, care, and wishes for a safe, beautiful return. ♥️
Thanks for getting it Dana ❤️ After 8 hours of angsting and searching, she finally came trotting in the door looking slightly freaked out but still in one piece! Oh my, sometimes it scares me how much I love those two little beings...
Btw I think it's so symbolic that the earthquake happened on your 50th.... I definitely feel a sense of the earth moving under my feet during this life stage...
That makes my whole day, Vicki. Hooray! Thank you so much for the beautiful update. ❤️
It definitely feels symbolic... like crossing a threshold into a whole new place of exploration and discovery.
Sending you wishes for lots and lots of kitty cuddles!
So glad Tigerlily is back safe with you, Vicki!
And what a sweet name for a kitty. 💕
Thank you Allison 💓
thank you, a fun read. I'm glad your home was not damaged in the earthquake....the stories of how the people respond, the helpfulness, the calmness are beautiful. I have not been through any natural disasters here but I imagine the people here in Mexico would respond similiary. Your experiences have some parallels with my first days after moving to Mexico with two suitcases. (gave away all cotton bedding and towels). Besides the heat and navigating the unknown city of Merida with insanely irrational addresses and street names, and oh yes, switching to metric and new currency, new Android when I'd had a iphone....what was hardest was the absence of anything I would consider healthy food (there are just so many tacos a girl can eat). Besides all that, what did me in for a while, were the synthetic sheets and towels, everything reeking of scented laundry soap, the mattress had a plastic cover on it which made it all so much hotter (took about 3 weeks to discover the tiny mites that the cover was protecting me against, a dermatological horror show). I had a total meltdown and fortunately was given some useful suggestions inside an expat Facebook group. I
The (VERY) scented laundry soap! One of our first errands after settling in here was finding an unscented alternative. It took going to a fancier grocery store but was well worth it.
I love hearing about your move to Mexico, Ellen! There sure are challenges and blessings in relocating to an entirely new place. It makes life feel more alive and interesting, to say the least... 😅
From the grounding image of your big toe to the uplifting image of mama dove, and all the bits between, I LOVED reading this. Thank you 😊 🙏
Aww... thank you, Carolyn! Wishing you a beautiful, easeful weekend. ❤️
Wow, what a welcome to the second half of life, my dear! It sounds a bit like the old show Survivor, like where are the camera people hiding?
About the workspace. I, too, had a "I don't need anything" style workspace. Likely, subconsciously, I didn't feel worthy of, well, being my own boss, and thought I would fire myself any day.
I had a magical Feng Shui session with Dorena of House Magic, and one little suggestion about moving a table became the impetus I needed (well, there was also something I was inadvertently carrying around from childhood and maybe past lives impacting how I saw home spaces - gulp).
It feels GREAT having a workspace I love and that supports me.
I hope you enjoy your new desk set up!!
Thank you for the warm welcome to the (potentially 😉) wiser side, Maria!
Your Feng Shui session sounds amazing. I’d love to do something like that, and I have no doubt about the powerful energetics of that work - the way we arrange ourselves and our belongings in space... and the unseen "packages" we carry from childhood and beyond.
One of the only downsides of our rental in Thailand is that it’s already furnished with way more furniture than my partner and I prefer (we love the feeling of SPACE). But having my new desk is giving me a small, private corner - a place where I can exhale, think, and create.
I agree it helps having space for energy to flow, but while you can't change that now, at least controlling your own comfort!
This is medicine I didn't know I needed. BEYOND grateful for you. 💜
Bunches and bunches of hearts to you, Steve. ♥️
Crochet and my partner has been keeping me nourished. Life feels stagnant or overwhelming at times and both of them just ground me
Thank you for this piece, btw. It was a wonderful read <3
That sounds deeply grounding and nourishing, Maverique. Thank you so much for being here. ♥️
Reading this while riding through Maryland, of all places. Happy 50, Dana.
Thank you, Amr. I saw your subscription show up today - you’re Amr from Cairo, correct? What a nice surprise! I hope all is well with you.
Yes, it's me. I will have to go back and read from the top (rather bottom on content streams) to catch up on your past few years.
You popped into my thoughts literally two days ago!
Then I must have been summoned.
Dana, when I started reading this, I literally tucked myself deeper into the couch because even though they happen in a place so foreign to me, reading your adventures is cozy and touching. I love knowing that you are out there loving your life and that you aren’t suffering through the triggering classroom dynamics of Thai class. Thank you for sharing.
Aww... thank you, Julie. I have a feeling that if you were here in class with me, we would’ve been cracking up at the absurdity of those guys... and writing hilarious essays about them. All the hearts to you. ♥️
Oh man! Your cramped desk-work space comment is a huge nudge to me to make a change with my ridiculous situation. I am stuck in inertia on this because it involves moving a very heavy old oak desk down a tricky set of stairs in order to get a different set up so I keep putting it off. Reading your essay made me realize how great I would feel to have something more suitable for me. Thanks Dana.
Yes! Do it, Donna! (But definitely get help. 😅) I don’t know about you, but I find that “putting up with” these seemingly small things day after day has ripple effects that extend beyond the immediate matter at hand. Working at this vanity - cramped and using a stool on wheels that’s always threatening to slip out from under me - leaves me less patient when I’m writing and working. And even though I’m practicing to temper that impatience, it absolutely leaves an energetic imprint, no matter how subtle.
Please report back! xo
You're a great motivator. I will report back!
I'm reeling from the thought of a government warning its citizens against being "earthquake drunk." For all the flaws of any government, and there are endless minor, major, and epic flaws in any government, there is a kindness in that warning that shakes me.
Right? It’s exactly the sort of guidance I want to hear from the government.
Beautiful 🙏
Thank you, Dee! 🙏
What a lovely read 💕 I’m in the middle of this years Ayurvedic cleanse, and that’s nurturing my body mind heart & spirit. Haven’t travelled for ages, but about 12 years ago I had a gap year that turned into 3, and that’s when I found myself in the Catalonian Pyrenees at an off grid project. The peace of that place went deep into your bones. You got a lift to a little village then the road ran out, but you kept going. Those mountains and everything I met there turned lots of things around. It’s where I finished my Ayurvedic healing diet to heal my digestion and related symptoms. When I left I got a little a little train to logronio, and walked 670km to Santiago along the Camino. I watched the earth turn from red to brown, and I met all the different ages of myself walking towards me as I went. Up with the sun, asleep with the moon. Arms and legs moving this way and that. A lot healed and was nourished across those 4 weeks. As arms and legs moved this way and that 😊
Oh, wow, Lucy. That sounds absolutely glorious. Thank you for sharing, so many hearts. ❤️
Ahhhhhh I just loved reading this, Dana. In part because it evoked so many good memories from my four trips to Thailand, the last one now ten years ago, and all based in Chiang Mai. And in part because I love hearing about the internal workings of your own heart/mind and how you navigate them.
I totally get it how 'small' things become pretty huge, and how finally addressing them can result in some big shifts. In my little world, lately I have felt very weighted down with the responsibility of being the sole caregiver for an elderly dog (who is actually mostly a joy to be around, but still, it's a huge responsibility). I rarely get a chance to be away for more than four or so hours, and travel is such a core need for me.
Yesterday, I arranged for a friend to come visit Lucy (my pup) mid-day so I could have the entire day to myself. I took a road trip to Taos, NM -- not super far, but far enough that it feels like an adventure to me. Followed my own rhythm, treated myself to breakfast, took a long walk to the Hanuman Temple (such a cool place!), had lunch with friends, took another long walk through some wetlands and saw amazing birds. It was eight hours away, and it was just the medicine I needed.
Thank you so much for being here, Maia. I love knowing that there are people (like you!) reading who have been here and already get the spirit of this place.
And my heart goes out to you and Lucy! Something about caring for sick and elderly animals brings so much beauty and grief to the surface for me. It’s as though they are a reflection of life for all of us - immediate and real, without veils or filters or stories. And being the sole caretaker for an elderly dog sounds both heart-expanding and heartbreaking. Sending love to you both, and wishes for you to take breathers and beautiful adventures whenever you can and it feels most nourishing and needed. xo
Dana, ooo how I love this; you’ve detailed perfectly, and with such perfect rhythm, how you got to “exit sooner.” I so envy your easeful life in Chiang Mai; such a contrast from our f**ked up life in the U.S. right now. And the calm words of advice to citizens from the Thai government!
Thank you so much, Debbie. And yes, life does feel quite easeful here in so many ways.
I loved reading this, Dana. All of it touched me. Especially the Mama Dove. I welled up a bit reading that. Last summer I had a Cardinal nest in my favorite Japanese Maple tree in my yard. The Mama was so sweet in tending to her nest. I watched daily, as closely as she would allow. The hatchlings were a complete delight to witness. My family left on a week vacation and when we returned, they had taken flight. There is a bright red cardinal that frequents my yard (pretty much daily) and I’ve convinced myself that he is one of the hatchlings, returning to his first home. 🪹
The memory of that is what is nourishing me today. Thank you for sparking that back up, Dana.
Also - this sentence:
“I settled into simplicity and rested from choice.”
My birthday is tomorrow and I will enter the first day of my 47th year resting from choice. I stared at that sentence for a few minutes and really took in how it landed for me. The use of the word “rested” in place of /instead of “resisted” calmed my whole nervous system. 🙏🏼 Thank you.
I love hearing about your returned hatchling - I find that animals stir such strong and immediate emotions in me.
And wishing you a beautiful, beautiful birthday! Resting from choice sounds like the perfect way to begin your 47th year. In Chinese Medicine, we encourage resting from choice during times of transition - keeping things simple, freeing up space.
Sending love and birthday blessings to you, Allison. ❤️
What perfect timing for me then - to rest from choice and see what this 47th year has chosen for me. 🫶
Thanks Dana.
Happy birthday, Allison! 🫶