There is so much to sit with in your writing, Dana -- truly grateful for this piece.
First of all, I love what you shared about your nightly reflective practice and the question at the heart of it -- how can I live a more beautiful life. That really touches me.
And I can relate to all you described about addictive patterns in play with online behavior, consuming, scrolling. I can't say I've figured a completely 'mindful' way of being on these platforms. I've greatly reduced Facebook and Instagram, and find time here on Substack more nourishing for my soul -- and yet. The same tendencies crop up -- the endless scrolling seeking for something, perhaps to fill an empty hole in my soul; the disappointment when not enough people 'like' something I did; the craving for 'more.'
I started out here trying to dedicate one time week, usually Sunday morning, to read through articles I had saved, much like I used to do long long ago before there was much internet and I enjoyed the Sunday New York Times with a cup of coffee. But it's so easy to slip. And it doesn't feel very wholesome, to use that word in its least judgmental context. It doesn't feel like I'm a whole being, it feels like I've been kidnapped by bots or something. Maybe that's the struggle of our times, to stay human in an increasingly digital world. And as you so skillfully describe, to actively engage with our addictions and to heal. Thank you.
Thank you so much, Maia - both for your kind words and for sharing a window into your own exploration and practice. Oof. There really is no easy answer. A simple one, maybe, but sure isn’t easy. I do find even just having these conversations to be important and helpful. ❤️
"It doesn't feel like I'm a whole being, it feels like I've been kidnapped by bots or something. Maybe that's the struggle of our times, to stay human in an increasingly digital world."
This is brilliant and sums it up so well, thank you for sharing!
And thanks Dana for your wisdom, honesty and gentle challenge in this piece - grateful as every for your insights and authenticity! As I've pulled away from some patterns and places I could feel myself doing too much scrolling I've noticed the itch to replace those habits with getting a different version of the same soothing elsewhere, though reading via Pocket (rather than on Substack itself, for instance) really helps me slow down and feel more present with the actual content of what I'm reading, vs the sense of consuming or somehow urgently having to 'catch up'. That feels closer to the coffee and newspapers ritual Maia describes and I'm grateful for it, but the scroll does still sneak in if I'm not careful!
Thank you, Jane. And I’ve never heard of Pocket - maybe I’ll check it out. Because YES: the feeling of needing to "catch up" seems constant and insatiable lately. So many hearts to you!
Thank you so much for this wisdom Dana... Much for me to reflect on here, so much I relate to. I will read this many times I think... I have noticed this lately how my online consumption is like an assault on my senses of information - and yet I so often use it as a way to take 'a quick break', often from parenting e.g. when my son is watching TV for 10 mins. I often don't have long enough to do yoga or sink into a meditation (but if I'm being truly honest - would I/do I do that even when I'm not looking after my son e.g. I DO have time), so I just go on Substack or Instagram or YouTube or check my emails and it's just an immediate overwhelming assault of images, words, ideas, videos, information... Just WAY too much for my brain to process. It make my body feel so tense and stressed and like you - my brain just buzzing, trying to make sense of it all.
And also, I try to bring myself compassion. Just like with any addiction: it's just an innocent, misguided attempt to get my needs met. And I can change. Just like I unhooked myself from alcohol - something I used to never think would be possible - I hope I can move away, with love, from using online content to soothe myself.
AND - also love your words about how we're always trying to fix ourselves.. I am always looking for the next book, podcast, practice that will FINALLY fix me, make me whole, make me a 'good' person worthy of love.... And of course, that's not possible, that's not how it works. And being the journey to being truly whole is the journey of acceptance of what is, everything, all of me, that is here right now.
Thank you for sharing and for being here, Ellie. That’s such a great point about how many of us (self included) hop online to “take a break,” even though doing so does not give our mind, body, or nervous system a break! So similar to alcohol, I find: seeking relief in something that delivers the exact opposite. I love your hopeful message and reminder that we CAN shift this - and have proven our capacity by getting sober from alcohol. Sobriety is such a gift in that way, showing us that something that once felt impossible is not only possible but can turn out amazing.
Dana, thank you so much, there is so much light coming through this piece. It has hit me straight in the places that know, the places that need attention. My facebook time is purposeful, I have a private group of 160 women where I simply post 3 recovery readings each morning, my sponsees share as well and then I'm out. 10 minutes max) even that feels draining but I continue because I know it has value. The instant I hit Instagram I feel like I've dipped myself in a vast of poisoned depression. I will look occasionally, I used to spend up to 2 hours but that is almost out the door.
What you wrote about settle in the evening, the way you got through your layers to get to your heart is HUGE. I have a small morning practice. I get still and connect before I do anything. Nothing comes before I've opened the door to God to walk into my day before I do.
When I first found Substack it felt SO nourishing and in a way it still does but I am struggling with notes and the little orange notification lights up my inner addict the same way facebook and instagram did so I am right smack dab in the middle of navigating that around my soul as I work to create content. I made the choice to go paywall free and am trying to write a book at the same time. I am very new so feel at times scattered and all consumed by the scroll. If I'm not scrolling, I'm reading or walking on the trails with my partner and my pups so there is balance but...that word frenetic...yes...it is the frenetic that I am no longer willing to live with. I know I will not have either the inner or outer life if the frenetic is present. So I strive for balance, offering, and gratitude. These 3 guideposts tend to, most days, keep me on the path that leads to peace and tranquility.
This is a piece that will be reread...more than once...I want to metabolize it...my soul followed it, then my heart, then my mind. It was incredibly powerful and I thank you so much💓
Thank you so much for being here and for sharing, Niki. Your Facebook group sounds so special and supportive, as does your morning practice. I hear you about Notes! I have to be careful on there, lest I end up scrolling mindlessly - seeking whatever’s “right around the corner” rather than taking in what I’m reading. I love your guideposts and felt some deep part of me exhale just on reading them. Wishing you much peace and serenity! ❤️
My being online too long means (literal) physical signs, like a sore shoulder and strained eyes. Depending on platform, it can also mean a bad mood, exhaustion, being frazzled, or any combination of the above.
I finally had to declare “platform bankruptcy.” That primarily meant exiting FB and some online forums I was living in, but also a lot less time on IG & Twitter. Now I use Feedly to aggregate RSS feeds and get my news, and am much more intentional with social media.
Like you, it’s definitely a “progress not perfection” scenario, but even just adding a little friction like having to log in on a lap top has made a huge difference in my state of mind.
I so hear you on the physical toll, Kevin - not to mention the impact on mood, energy, etc. Huge recognition for the steps you’re taking - things like that can make such a big, supportive difference.
i could not relate more. I wish i had answers. I was once told by a wise person that asking the right questions is more important though, and that you are doing. Thank you for sharing this.
Another exquisite piece of writing, and one that speaks so deeply to all I've experienced in the past few months. As you might remember, my black dog made itself painfully visible when I stepped away from the lure of social media and stopped numbing my pain with endless scrolling. I'm definitely better away from social media, but the endless consumption hasn't ended. There are plenty of other online sources of distraction and numbing, and I know that I still battle a technology addicted part of my being.
My physiotherapist assured me the other day that all the physical problems I am currently experiencing on top of the mental challenges that are weighing me down are all connected, that I am 'Chronically stressed and burnt out", and that what I need more than anything is to reduce the demands on my brain and allow myself 'kick ass rest'.
But it's so hard. I wrote a note to myself today that said "Self care isn't meant to be an endless to-do list of things you have to do to be well, it is supposed to be rooted in self compassion, not demands", and then proceeded to list all the things that I "could" do. It very quickly started to look like a todo list!
You only have to be online for about 5 minutes to see something about the 'BEST' self care tips, and add another item to the list of things you think you have to do. It's exhausting, and I often think that what I really need most of all right now is a week in the woods with no technology at all, and a chance to reset my brain and body completely, But in the meantime, I think I need to remind myself that "you’re not a problem to solve. You’re a human, being and becoming. You will keep being and becoming until your last breath.", and let myself slow down more.
It's not easy in this addiction driven world we inhabit, but it's the only way. Tech is working more and more against what our bodies, minds, nervous systems and community wellbeing need. Fighting that and reclaiming stillness, space and time away from it feels like a very radical, vital act of self care, maybe THE most important self care practice we can bring into life.
Thanks so much for your kind words and for sharing a window into your own experience, exploration, and practice, Esther. Everything you wrote rings so true. And a week in the woods with no technology sounds absolutely divine. ❤️
This is so true for me as well! I am actually away for a week in the woods, but obviously I have brought technology with me. I couldn’t bear the thought of not having some way to distract myself. Still, this is the most solitude I have carved out for myself in,…I don’t know in how long or if ever.
Oooof. Something just shifted for me while reading this essay. Thank you, Dana. 🙏🏼
Even with diligent curating, consuming others content still pulls me away from me.
When I first quit alcohol, I thought I could get sober my osmosis. I was reading /listening to all the quit lit and all the sober podcasts thinking that was the answer. The cure. I did this for at least 18 months (I still lean too much into this). It wasn’t until I got quiet - turned the volume down on everything- that I finally felt free.
I so resonate with that, Allison - I couldn’t get enough sober content that first year! Even now, I feel wonderfully at home in such content and among the folks creating it. Sober people are my people ❤️. But ah, yes. Like you, I still needed to turn the volume way down before getting to some next chapter in this book without ending...
I love these reflections Dana, and relate to this so much. I've carved out a simple, quiet, slow-living lifestyle on the whole, but like you, the thing that robs my inner peace is too much time scrolling. It feels like indigestion - when you've consumed more than you can process and integrate. Sometimes I just have to step away (and do) but then I feel disconnected, out-of-touch and a sense of FOMO (especially here on Substack!) It's an ongoing calibration, trying to find the balance that feeds me without overwhelming me and disconnecting me from myself....
Thank you, Vicki. I love the idea of ongoing calibration with all of this...and I have no doubt, reading your writing, that you bring much consciousness and care to your online and offline worlds. ❤️
Real synchronicity for me here. I was visiting a friend today, and we were exploring this topic, and both recognised that we scroll in the evenings when what we are really looking for is connection, we see this, we decide to stop, we cut back, but really we both felt we bargain with an addiction, because we noticed that when we stop cold turkey, thinking our creativity will flow, it doesn’t, and we seem to lose our mojo, we both experience this. For myself I see this over and again and each time I think, this time I will address it. And what I have realised is, that while I don’t scroll much any more, and have become very choosy about what I allow to pass into my senses, I do still scroll, because an addiction has developed. I said to my friend, I felt I needed to turn all screens off at the end of the working day, and that I felt I would meet that lack of mojo, that flatness, which I think is just a cold turkey phase I have to go through, if I want to come out the other side, and get my creativity properly flowing again.
Thank you so much for sharing a peek into your conversation, Lucy. I love that such conversations are happening, and that rings so true. I remember experiencing quite a bit of agitation, restlessness, flatness, and emptiness after quitting Facebook, in particular. It felt very similar to my first weeks without alcohol. Good news is: That discomfort didn’t last! And I’ve never regretted quitting either of those things. Currently, I still have to watch myself closely with Notes. I find immersing myself in a writing project helpful. 😊
I'm so glad I came across this beautiful writing of yours, Dana. I love the idea of a nightly meditation practice; which is a perfect example of finding that balance. It’s a way to tune out the noise and tune into what’s real and present. It's important to create a space for ourselves to process, integrate, and simply exist without the constant barrage of digital noise. That’s something I think we all could benefit from.
Thank you for your generous words, Mo. And so much yes to creating space, tuning in, and remembering how to listen to something other than digital noise.
Thank you Dana , a human after my own mind in the last few months I have been through some remarkable life changes eviction, relocation which had lead to changes in lifestyle my home now is free of addiction as I call it no TV or other distractions I’m ADHD I had masses of “stuff” with the help of my friend I let go I now live a minimalist lifestyle in a small apartment I let music and yoga therapy be my guide.
I’m aware of the world around me but looking at “screens” can be insidious seeping into your mind and it will effect your mental health I’m now free of that and the improvement it’s made is remarkable I’m an outdoors person I can take time walk and absorb the the world around me
I could go on but just to say your piece resonates with me from the beginning thank you for sharing your story 💚
This was really great. Loved the section about you can’t fix it through consumption. At the end of the day one has to do the work and not only watch others do the work. Really great article as always.
What I love about creating recovery content is that it opens the discussion for people to do the work. You articles make people think and that is creates the door of willingness to change. With willingness anything is possible.
Thank you, Damon. Your comment made my evening! And yes, recovery content opens a door of inquiry to folks beyond the recovery community. I love we can offer that.
"...too much consumption is still too much, whatever the content. It leaves no room. Not for receiving, processing, and integrating. Not for synthesizing, alchemizing, and creating. Not for spirit. Even small doses of constant noise, consumption, and striving leave no room for spirit."
And no room for hearing ourselves. That is what I have been noticing as of late. Like your evening practice, I find my silence and time for reflection in the dark of the morning. It is my favorite time of day. And the time I can best hear myself. I have been aware that sometimes I spend a great deal of time looking for suggestions and following others' advice. And often times there is great value in what I find. But when I really get quiet, I can sort through all of it and pull out what actually feels true for me. And I'm learning to trust that I know.
I love everything about this and agree whole heartedly. I think the problem of scale and velocity is going to be exponentially worsened by AI, so as I’ve argued, we need to divest and ask for alternatives that do not do this to our psyche/or as you say so beautifully: our souls. I am off social media completely now (substack is my last attempt at having a place to write that doesn’t become facebook, we’ll see!) I miss the good things in social media but to cope I try to recreate them elsewhere where they were before: new ways to seek information, community and expression. Of course they’re actually just the old ways… I hope it gets less hard as more of us do it?
Thanks so much for sharing, Janine. Huge recognition for your own path with this and for seeking and creating alternatives that feel more expansive and supportive. And, oof - despite "trying to be human," AI sure does bring the difference between digital technology and humanity into sharp relief. Maybe, just maybe, this will help us appreciate real humans all the more. ❤️
Wow. Thank you for sharing, Janine. THIS: "Capitalism has always exploited human labor, but now, the new surveillance capitalism extracts and exploits human attention." And THIS: "Why allow our beautiful, exquisite brains to devolve into validation-addled slot machines? Why let our cultural life be reduced to a series of transactions?" And the whole thing, really. Everyone go read!
There is so much to sit with in your writing, Dana -- truly grateful for this piece.
First of all, I love what you shared about your nightly reflective practice and the question at the heart of it -- how can I live a more beautiful life. That really touches me.
And I can relate to all you described about addictive patterns in play with online behavior, consuming, scrolling. I can't say I've figured a completely 'mindful' way of being on these platforms. I've greatly reduced Facebook and Instagram, and find time here on Substack more nourishing for my soul -- and yet. The same tendencies crop up -- the endless scrolling seeking for something, perhaps to fill an empty hole in my soul; the disappointment when not enough people 'like' something I did; the craving for 'more.'
I started out here trying to dedicate one time week, usually Sunday morning, to read through articles I had saved, much like I used to do long long ago before there was much internet and I enjoyed the Sunday New York Times with a cup of coffee. But it's so easy to slip. And it doesn't feel very wholesome, to use that word in its least judgmental context. It doesn't feel like I'm a whole being, it feels like I've been kidnapped by bots or something. Maybe that's the struggle of our times, to stay human in an increasingly digital world. And as you so skillfully describe, to actively engage with our addictions and to heal. Thank you.
Thank you so much, Maia - both for your kind words and for sharing a window into your own exploration and practice. Oof. There really is no easy answer. A simple one, maybe, but sure isn’t easy. I do find even just having these conversations to be important and helpful. ❤️
"It doesn't feel like I'm a whole being, it feels like I've been kidnapped by bots or something. Maybe that's the struggle of our times, to stay human in an increasingly digital world."
This is brilliant and sums it up so well, thank you for sharing!
And thanks Dana for your wisdom, honesty and gentle challenge in this piece - grateful as every for your insights and authenticity! As I've pulled away from some patterns and places I could feel myself doing too much scrolling I've noticed the itch to replace those habits with getting a different version of the same soothing elsewhere, though reading via Pocket (rather than on Substack itself, for instance) really helps me slow down and feel more present with the actual content of what I'm reading, vs the sense of consuming or somehow urgently having to 'catch up'. That feels closer to the coffee and newspapers ritual Maia describes and I'm grateful for it, but the scroll does still sneak in if I'm not careful!
Thank you, Jane. And I’ve never heard of Pocket - maybe I’ll check it out. Because YES: the feeling of needing to "catch up" seems constant and insatiable lately. So many hearts to you!
Thank you so much for this wisdom Dana... Much for me to reflect on here, so much I relate to. I will read this many times I think... I have noticed this lately how my online consumption is like an assault on my senses of information - and yet I so often use it as a way to take 'a quick break', often from parenting e.g. when my son is watching TV for 10 mins. I often don't have long enough to do yoga or sink into a meditation (but if I'm being truly honest - would I/do I do that even when I'm not looking after my son e.g. I DO have time), so I just go on Substack or Instagram or YouTube or check my emails and it's just an immediate overwhelming assault of images, words, ideas, videos, information... Just WAY too much for my brain to process. It make my body feel so tense and stressed and like you - my brain just buzzing, trying to make sense of it all.
And also, I try to bring myself compassion. Just like with any addiction: it's just an innocent, misguided attempt to get my needs met. And I can change. Just like I unhooked myself from alcohol - something I used to never think would be possible - I hope I can move away, with love, from using online content to soothe myself.
AND - also love your words about how we're always trying to fix ourselves.. I am always looking for the next book, podcast, practice that will FINALLY fix me, make me whole, make me a 'good' person worthy of love.... And of course, that's not possible, that's not how it works. And being the journey to being truly whole is the journey of acceptance of what is, everything, all of me, that is here right now.
Thank you for sharing and for being here, Ellie. That’s such a great point about how many of us (self included) hop online to “take a break,” even though doing so does not give our mind, body, or nervous system a break! So similar to alcohol, I find: seeking relief in something that delivers the exact opposite. I love your hopeful message and reminder that we CAN shift this - and have proven our capacity by getting sober from alcohol. Sobriety is such a gift in that way, showing us that something that once felt impossible is not only possible but can turn out amazing.
Such lovely and profound awareness, Ellie - "just like with any addiction: it's just an innocent, misguided attempt to get my needs met."
Same. Same. Same!
Dana, thank you so much, there is so much light coming through this piece. It has hit me straight in the places that know, the places that need attention. My facebook time is purposeful, I have a private group of 160 women where I simply post 3 recovery readings each morning, my sponsees share as well and then I'm out. 10 minutes max) even that feels draining but I continue because I know it has value. The instant I hit Instagram I feel like I've dipped myself in a vast of poisoned depression. I will look occasionally, I used to spend up to 2 hours but that is almost out the door.
What you wrote about settle in the evening, the way you got through your layers to get to your heart is HUGE. I have a small morning practice. I get still and connect before I do anything. Nothing comes before I've opened the door to God to walk into my day before I do.
When I first found Substack it felt SO nourishing and in a way it still does but I am struggling with notes and the little orange notification lights up my inner addict the same way facebook and instagram did so I am right smack dab in the middle of navigating that around my soul as I work to create content. I made the choice to go paywall free and am trying to write a book at the same time. I am very new so feel at times scattered and all consumed by the scroll. If I'm not scrolling, I'm reading or walking on the trails with my partner and my pups so there is balance but...that word frenetic...yes...it is the frenetic that I am no longer willing to live with. I know I will not have either the inner or outer life if the frenetic is present. So I strive for balance, offering, and gratitude. These 3 guideposts tend to, most days, keep me on the path that leads to peace and tranquility.
This is a piece that will be reread...more than once...I want to metabolize it...my soul followed it, then my heart, then my mind. It was incredibly powerful and I thank you so much💓
Thank you so much for being here and for sharing, Niki. Your Facebook group sounds so special and supportive, as does your morning practice. I hear you about Notes! I have to be careful on there, lest I end up scrolling mindlessly - seeking whatever’s “right around the corner” rather than taking in what I’m reading. I love your guideposts and felt some deep part of me exhale just on reading them. Wishing you much peace and serenity! ❤️
Sending love and grounded joy, may it always reach you above the fray🙏
Beautiful contemplation on the soul and the scroll and the impact in stepping away. I find I’m always navigating the brink of “too
Much” of myself online.
Thank you, Caroline. This topic feels so alive for me lately, and I imagine I’m not alone in that!
My being online too long means (literal) physical signs, like a sore shoulder and strained eyes. Depending on platform, it can also mean a bad mood, exhaustion, being frazzled, or any combination of the above.
I finally had to declare “platform bankruptcy.” That primarily meant exiting FB and some online forums I was living in, but also a lot less time on IG & Twitter. Now I use Feedly to aggregate RSS feeds and get my news, and am much more intentional with social media.
Like you, it’s definitely a “progress not perfection” scenario, but even just adding a little friction like having to log in on a lap top has made a huge difference in my state of mind.
I so hear you on the physical toll, Kevin - not to mention the impact on mood, energy, etc. Huge recognition for the steps you’re taking - things like that can make such a big, supportive difference.
Thank you!
i could not relate more. I wish i had answers. I was once told by a wise person that asking the right questions is more important though, and that you are doing. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you, Natalie. And those are wise words indeed!
Another exquisite piece of writing, and one that speaks so deeply to all I've experienced in the past few months. As you might remember, my black dog made itself painfully visible when I stepped away from the lure of social media and stopped numbing my pain with endless scrolling. I'm definitely better away from social media, but the endless consumption hasn't ended. There are plenty of other online sources of distraction and numbing, and I know that I still battle a technology addicted part of my being.
My physiotherapist assured me the other day that all the physical problems I am currently experiencing on top of the mental challenges that are weighing me down are all connected, that I am 'Chronically stressed and burnt out", and that what I need more than anything is to reduce the demands on my brain and allow myself 'kick ass rest'.
But it's so hard. I wrote a note to myself today that said "Self care isn't meant to be an endless to-do list of things you have to do to be well, it is supposed to be rooted in self compassion, not demands", and then proceeded to list all the things that I "could" do. It very quickly started to look like a todo list!
You only have to be online for about 5 minutes to see something about the 'BEST' self care tips, and add another item to the list of things you think you have to do. It's exhausting, and I often think that what I really need most of all right now is a week in the woods with no technology at all, and a chance to reset my brain and body completely, But in the meantime, I think I need to remind myself that "you’re not a problem to solve. You’re a human, being and becoming. You will keep being and becoming until your last breath.", and let myself slow down more.
It's not easy in this addiction driven world we inhabit, but it's the only way. Tech is working more and more against what our bodies, minds, nervous systems and community wellbeing need. Fighting that and reclaiming stillness, space and time away from it feels like a very radical, vital act of self care, maybe THE most important self care practice we can bring into life.
Thanks so much for your kind words and for sharing a window into your own experience, exploration, and practice, Esther. Everything you wrote rings so true. And a week in the woods with no technology sounds absolutely divine. ❤️
This is so true for me as well! I am actually away for a week in the woods, but obviously I have brought technology with me. I couldn’t bear the thought of not having some way to distract myself. Still, this is the most solitude I have carved out for myself in,…I don’t know in how long or if ever.
Hurray for your week in the woods, Jennifer!
Oh, how wonderful, have the most beautiful time in the woods! I hope you find what you need in the solitude you have gifted yourself 💜🌳
Oooof. Something just shifted for me while reading this essay. Thank you, Dana. 🙏🏼
Even with diligent curating, consuming others content still pulls me away from me.
When I first quit alcohol, I thought I could get sober my osmosis. I was reading /listening to all the quit lit and all the sober podcasts thinking that was the answer. The cure. I did this for at least 18 months (I still lean too much into this). It wasn’t until I got quiet - turned the volume down on everything- that I finally felt free.
Thanks for writing this.
I so resonate with that, Allison - I couldn’t get enough sober content that first year! Even now, I feel wonderfully at home in such content and among the folks creating it. Sober people are my people ❤️. But ah, yes. Like you, I still needed to turn the volume way down before getting to some next chapter in this book without ending...
“Urgency is a destroyer”
So true. I’ve learned so much about pace—and about getting to things in their own time—not on the proposed schedule of others. So hard yet so healing.
Thanks Dana for the thoughtful discussion about self-intervention.
Thank you, Dee. I love your use of “pace” there - that feels so good and right. I still struggle with letting go of the illusion of urgency but am finding Africa Brooke’s work immensely helpful. Here’s a recent podcast episode, but she has many relevant ones: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/077-rejecting-urgency-culture/id1508176184?i=1000650312448
I love these reflections Dana, and relate to this so much. I've carved out a simple, quiet, slow-living lifestyle on the whole, but like you, the thing that robs my inner peace is too much time scrolling. It feels like indigestion - when you've consumed more than you can process and integrate. Sometimes I just have to step away (and do) but then I feel disconnected, out-of-touch and a sense of FOMO (especially here on Substack!) It's an ongoing calibration, trying to find the balance that feeds me without overwhelming me and disconnecting me from myself....
Thank you, Vicki. I love the idea of ongoing calibration with all of this...and I have no doubt, reading your writing, that you bring much consciousness and care to your online and offline worlds. ❤️
Real synchronicity for me here. I was visiting a friend today, and we were exploring this topic, and both recognised that we scroll in the evenings when what we are really looking for is connection, we see this, we decide to stop, we cut back, but really we both felt we bargain with an addiction, because we noticed that when we stop cold turkey, thinking our creativity will flow, it doesn’t, and we seem to lose our mojo, we both experience this. For myself I see this over and again and each time I think, this time I will address it. And what I have realised is, that while I don’t scroll much any more, and have become very choosy about what I allow to pass into my senses, I do still scroll, because an addiction has developed. I said to my friend, I felt I needed to turn all screens off at the end of the working day, and that I felt I would meet that lack of mojo, that flatness, which I think is just a cold turkey phase I have to go through, if I want to come out the other side, and get my creativity properly flowing again.
Thank you so much for sharing a peek into your conversation, Lucy. I love that such conversations are happening, and that rings so true. I remember experiencing quite a bit of agitation, restlessness, flatness, and emptiness after quitting Facebook, in particular. It felt very similar to my first weeks without alcohol. Good news is: That discomfort didn’t last! And I’ve never regretted quitting either of those things. Currently, I still have to watch myself closely with Notes. I find immersing myself in a writing project helpful. 😊
I'm so glad I came across this beautiful writing of yours, Dana. I love the idea of a nightly meditation practice; which is a perfect example of finding that balance. It’s a way to tune out the noise and tune into what’s real and present. It's important to create a space for ourselves to process, integrate, and simply exist without the constant barrage of digital noise. That’s something I think we all could benefit from.
Thank you for your generous words, Mo. And so much yes to creating space, tuning in, and remembering how to listen to something other than digital noise.
Thank you Dana , a human after my own mind in the last few months I have been through some remarkable life changes eviction, relocation which had lead to changes in lifestyle my home now is free of addiction as I call it no TV or other distractions I’m ADHD I had masses of “stuff” with the help of my friend I let go I now live a minimalist lifestyle in a small apartment I let music and yoga therapy be my guide.
I’m aware of the world around me but looking at “screens” can be insidious seeping into your mind and it will effect your mental health I’m now free of that and the improvement it’s made is remarkable I’m an outdoors person I can take time walk and absorb the the world around me
I could go on but just to say your piece resonates with me from the beginning thank you for sharing your story 💚
That’s fantastic, Marcel. Congrats on creating a space that’s supportive for you, and thank you for being here and sharing.
This was really great. Loved the section about you can’t fix it through consumption. At the end of the day one has to do the work and not only watch others do the work. Really great article as always.
Thank you so much, Damon. And very true about doing the work!
What I love about creating recovery content is that it opens the discussion for people to do the work. You articles make people think and that is creates the door of willingness to change. With willingness anything is possible.
Thank you, Damon. Your comment made my evening! And yes, recovery content opens a door of inquiry to folks beyond the recovery community. I love we can offer that.
*love that we can offer that. :)
"...too much consumption is still too much, whatever the content. It leaves no room. Not for receiving, processing, and integrating. Not for synthesizing, alchemizing, and creating. Not for spirit. Even small doses of constant noise, consumption, and striving leave no room for spirit."
And no room for hearing ourselves. That is what I have been noticing as of late. Like your evening practice, I find my silence and time for reflection in the dark of the morning. It is my favorite time of day. And the time I can best hear myself. I have been aware that sometimes I spend a great deal of time looking for suggestions and following others' advice. And often times there is great value in what I find. But when I really get quiet, I can sort through all of it and pull out what actually feels true for me. And I'm learning to trust that I know.
I love that so much, Sarah. Thank you for sharing.
I love everything about this and agree whole heartedly. I think the problem of scale and velocity is going to be exponentially worsened by AI, so as I’ve argued, we need to divest and ask for alternatives that do not do this to our psyche/or as you say so beautifully: our souls. I am off social media completely now (substack is my last attempt at having a place to write that doesn’t become facebook, we’ll see!) I miss the good things in social media but to cope I try to recreate them elsewhere where they were before: new ways to seek information, community and expression. Of course they’re actually just the old ways… I hope it gets less hard as more of us do it?
Thanks so much for sharing, Janine. Huge recognition for your own path with this and for seeking and creating alternatives that feel more expansive and supportive. And, oof - despite "trying to be human," AI sure does bring the difference between digital technology and humanity into sharp relief. Maybe, just maybe, this will help us appreciate real humans all the more. ❤️
I thought you'd resonate: https://kingdomofculture.substack.com/p/discourse-on-digital-colonialism
Wow. Thank you for sharing, Janine. THIS: "Capitalism has always exploited human labor, but now, the new surveillance capitalism extracts and exploits human attention." And THIS: "Why allow our beautiful, exquisite brains to devolve into validation-addled slot machines? Why let our cultural life be reduced to a series of transactions?" And the whole thing, really. Everyone go read!
😊