Community Pop-Up: I heard this once—and never forgot it.
Open thread, share your thoughts! 💬
You’re invited to a community pop-up!
Every so often, I open up this space as a way for you to connect with others in the Sober Soulful community. This month, I have a short story for you, followed by a question and an invitation to share.
First, the story:
When I was going through a DIY divorce, my dad paid for a half-hour consult with an attorney (Susan) to make sure I understood exactly what I had to file and do. As I sat across from her—heartbroken, with nothing to my name, struggling to hold back sobs, and overwhelmed by all the forms and steps—she looked at me and said, “This part isn’t hard. This is just paperwork.”
I repeated that mantra to myself a lot that winter. It was the hardest winter I can remember. But getting the divorce done, one step at a time—usually on my rushed lunch break as a college instructor—was just paperwork.
Now, whenever I face a similarly daunting, multi-step process that could easily bring me to tears, I remember Susan and tell myself, “This part isn’t hard. This is just paperwork.” Then I take it one step after the next.
This happened years ago (and, surprise twist: my ex and I are now remarried), but I still think about Susan’s words often. It’s a reminder that we never really know the impact of a passing remark—how long it might stay with someone or how much strength it might offer them later.
Now, you.
Is there a mantra that’s supporting you right now? Or a line—maybe even an offhand comment—someone once said to you that stuck and has helped you through something? I’d love to hear it. (And it might be exactly what someone else needs to hear today, too.)
Find someone in the comments whose mantra or words resonate with you and let them know. Please don’t skip this part! A few heartfelt words can have a greater impact than we might imagine.
Bonus: Restack your comment and this post on Notes (Substack’s social media platform). The more people see it, the more connections can be made, and the more beautiful ripples can be sent outwards.
As in recovery groups, please help keep this space free from unsolicited advice, political commentary, or anything that spreads hate and division. Thank you.
Before jumping in, a small request: Tap the little ♡ to offer the gift of “social proof” and bring some extra brightness to this gathering.
P.S. If you’re new here, welcome!
Sober Soulful offers a safe, expansive space for anyone 1) in recovery or examining their relationship to any helpful pattern, 2) seeking an intimate exploration of how we can live more beautifully.
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Not sober? Not a problem!
No need to identify as an addict, sober, sober curious, or in recovery to hang out here. The 3,800+ member community at Sober Soulful is wonderfully diverse, and I hold recovery and sobriety in a living, breathing, ever-changing way. We’re all human here, after all. We’re all still figuring it out.
Thank you. I appreciate you. I’ll meet you in the comments!
- Dana
Every storm runs out of rain.
When I told a massage therapist during the invasion of Iraq how upset I was about it, she said to me, "Right now there might be nothing you can do. But you have to take care of yourself so that when there is something you can do, you'll be capable of doing it."
That remark made such a strong impression on me that I've taken self care very seriously ever since.