Hey. Dana here. Rather than send an essay this week, I thought I’d do a more casual “life lately” share. If you were hoping for an essay, don’t worry—those will resume next week. I also link to popular ones below plus share a discount on annual subscriptions, which you can access here if you’re ready to go:
Since there’ve been quite a few new subscribers lately, I also want to say hello and thank you. I’m a one-person operation over here and feel a hit of heart-sourced appreciation each time someone subscribes, leaves a comment, shares my work, or fills in that little ♡ up top. Thank you.
AND, if you don’t remember subscribing or who I am, well, that’s fair. It’s a crowded, noisy world out there. Hopefully Sober Soulful offers a refuge of quiet and spaciousness. As for the person behind the words? Let me fill you in.
Home & Partnership
I’m a doctor of Chinese Medicine and writer living in rural Nova Scotia near the Atlantic. I moved here from Salt Spring Island (and Victoria, before that), British Columbia just over a year ago. Truthfully, I miss BC (especially my forever home of Nelson). Still, Nova Scotia is salt-of-the-earth, more affordable, less rushed—all things I love.
I’m renting a home on 14 acres of forested land with my partner and two Siamese cats—LingDao and LingXu, named after acupuncture points. My partner Randy and I are twice married, once divorced. Our wedding anniversaries are July 13, 2013, and August 13, 2020.
We don’t follow the same rules as most married folk, and this is our first time living together in years. I much prefer to live alone and thrive on abundant silence and solitude. I’m also kind of impossible to live with (unless you’re a cat—in which case, we’ll probably do just fine).
We have this rental for one more year (the family’s abroad and wants their house back next August). Thereafter, we’ll likely resume living apart together—perhaps in Nova Scotia, perhaps elsewhere. Meanwhile, we have separate bedrooms, baths, etc., and I’ve staked claim to the rustic cabin out back.
Work & Writing
Until March of this year, I was working remotely as Dean of Acupuncture and Chinese Medicine at a college in Victoria. These days, I fly solo—splitting work hours between Chinese Medicine and writing.
On the Chinese Medicine side, I see patients locally at clinic and do remote herbal and diet consults with people all over Canada and the United States (and beyond, if they don’t need herbs shipped to them). I also create and sell online, self-guided courses for Chinese Medicine students and practitioners.
On the writing side, I’m a content writer and ghostwriter for several clients who pay a hefty portion of my income. Pressed to choose, my favourite of these is a 70-year-old white, straight, cis, exceptionally fit man living in Miami and accustomed to the spotlight. Seeing as I’m a 48-year-old, reclusive, queer yogi hiding out in rural Nova Scotia, this both amuses and delights me. He and I, for all our differences, share core values and lifestyle practices. He’s also an amazing, inspiring person.
Of course, my true love is the sort of writing I do here, on Sober Soulful. I share raw, unfiltered essays about sobriety, soulful living, and learning to show up more beautifully, in integrity. If I could do only one job, this would be it. (Feel free to support the dream. Wink, wink.)
I work lots, seven days a week. Not because I’m hyping The Hustle, but because working lots is necessary to cover bills and my cats’ groceries (which cost double my own). On the other hand, I’d work almost as much if I had millions—but it’d be on my writing rather than writing for others.
Spirituality & Sobriety
I also do lots of yoga and have been practicing twice daily for more than 20 years. It’s essential to my physical and mental wellbeing as well as my spirituality, which also includes daily seated meditation and weaves through Taoism, Buddhism, and awe-struck reverence for Nature and the Great Mystery.
I haven’t been to an actual yoga studio since 2020. I currently practice at home solo in addition to doing a 90-minute online class daily with phenomenal teachers and a dedicated community of practitioners. (Special gratitude to Corn, Erin, Esak, Giselle, Jasmine, Katy, and Tara—you’ve been a Godsend these past two years.)
Oh, and I’m sober! From alcohol since February 11, 2020. From cocaine for 11 years. From anorexia for more than 10 years outside of relapse amdist divorce.
I’m still untangling my addiction to all manner of things, most prominently: work and doing, external validation, obsessive-compulsive patterning, and online time (email and Substack checking; I’m mostly off social media and haven’t watched tv since 2019).
Those and anorexia are my “drugs of choice” and the hardest for me to kick. Meanwhile, alcohol and cocaine were kind of incidental. Still, alcohol is profoundly toxic and addictive to all humans—body, mind, and spirit. If you drink (even so-called normally or moderately), you’re doing tremendous harm. If you were to ask my advice as a doctor, I’d tell you to stop.
The choice to place spirituality and sobriety side-by-side (here and in Sober Soulful) is a conscious one. They are indivisible, for me. To live a sober life is to live a spiritual one, and vice versa. Lots more on that and addiction recovery here (these are older than three weeks and thus paywalled, but snag that discount for access):
What I’m Doing
I have a Now page, inspired by Derek Sivers, that I update regularly. But since we’re here, here’s what I’m doing right, right now:
Reading an advance copy of The Many Lives of Mama Love: A Memoir of Lying, Stealing, Writing, and Healing, by Lara Love Hardin, which actually came out this week but I’m behind in reading and reviewing. I’m fairly removed from the opiate scene outside of working at addiction treatment centres while living in south Florida. Lara’s window into that world is horrifying and hard to put down. Reading it, God am I grateful I never tried Oxy or heroin. One or both might’ve killed me. (Proper review coming soon; that’s an affiliate link and I’ll earn a small commission if you use it.)
Updating my website and plotting the course of things to come. Short version: I have too many jobs. A minimalist in all ways, I’m ever looking to streamline and simplify.
Sleeping in Halifax—in a dorm! University of King’s College and Dalhousie University rent student housing to visitors during the summer months (or maybe always). It’s loads less expensive than hotels and Airbnbs this time of year. Plus, I can play student—hanging with my laptop and books at the library, Uncommon Grounds, and the Glitter Bean.
Preparing for my parents to visit from the States later this month and in September. This will be the first time I’ve seen them in years and their first time visiting Nova Scotia. It will also be my first visit with family since giving up alcohol. This is no small thing.
What to Read (plus that discount)
I’ll be back to regular essays next week. If you’re looking for something now, here are a few reads plus a discount.
Everything on Sober Soulful goes behind the paywall three weeks after publishing. To get full access along with small gifts I send to paying subscribers monthly, sign up here. There’s a $5 monthly option as well as the opportunity to get 30 percent off the annual plan for life. That’ll get you a full year for just $21 USD ($28 CAD), and the rate locks in forever (but the deal expires August 31st).
I mean, hey—if you’re doing the sober thing and cutting booze, other drugs, unhelpful food, binge eating, online shopping, or some other drug of choice, this is a great way to invest a little of that cash you’re saving :).
Longer reads:
See above: The posts linked under Spirituality & Sobriety are long form (20-ish-minute reads).
See also:
Shorter reads:
When you’re existential and angsty:
When you crave grit and grace (from Serena, not me):
When you want a laugh and a lesson:
Why I don’t call myself an alcoholic:
Why none of us and all of us are right:
Looking for new-to-you newsletters? Someone besides me?
Don’t miss SoberStack! I update this annotated directory of Substack newsletters focused on addiction recovery and sobriety every few weeks. The most recent additions include:
A writer exploring the intersections of queer, Indigenous, and recovery identities as well as Indigenous perspectives on mental illness and mental health.
A comedian who writes and podcasts about his transition “from Alcoholic maniac to sober lunatic,” drawing on “20 years of booze soaked mayhem.”
A writer who’s been in recovery for more than 30 years and shares daily meditations full of honesty, accountability, and love.
A writer sharing about his late diagnosis of autism, along with recovery, alcohol use, and eating disorders.
A writer in Northern England who quit drinking at age 40, just celebrated one year without alcohol, and talks about how that’s working out.
A writer living in Long Beach and sharing “sobering thoughts on addictive feelings,” including as relates to relapse and a sober breakup.
A writer sharing nonfiction micro-essays along with the series “God Is My Boyfriend,” on recovery from sex and love addiction and her quest for the divine.
A journalist, bestselling author, psychotherapist, and TEDx speaker sharing heart-rendered wisdom on sober living, aging, and memoir writing.
You’ll find 57 newsletters (and growing!) by writers of many different ages and with varying lengths of sobriety—from newly sober to decades of continuous sobriety and everywhere in between.
They also represent a wide range of backgrounds, beliefs, paths to recovery, sober-specific challenges, and areas of focus (i.e., parenting, navigating mental health issues, getting sober in your 20s, getting sober in your 30s, getting sober in your 40s, AA-specific recovery, non-AA recovery, spiritual and soulful paths, writing and sobriety, addiction recovery in a wider sense than just alcohol and other drugs, etc.).
It’s a fantastic starting place for anyone who’s sober curious, newly sober, sober for decades, and anywhere in between:
You can always find it in the Sober Soulful navigation bar:
Whew. That was longer than expected. If you’re still here, hello! Before you go, I’d love for you to:
Tell me your favourite (non-alcoholic) drink in the comments, and/or
Answer two burning questions:
And that’s it! Thank you for being here—truly.
I appreciate you. I’m rooting for you. I love you.
Dana
P.S., Don’t forget that the current subscription sale ends soon. If you want unlimited access to the full archive, plus small gifts of gratitude twice a month and 30 percent off an annual plan forever, upgrade here:
If you’re already a paying subscriber, thank you from my whole heart. This is my most meaningful work—your generosity keeps it going. You’re already doing more than enough and taking an energetic stand through your offering. But if you feel called, tell a friend:
Hi Dana! My favourite drink is probably tea. Oh how, British. 😂 I also really love peppermint and ginger tea. So, still teas but a little less predictable. 😂
Thank you for another beautiful post. Have a lovely day. X
Favourite drinks are all teas - my (caffeine-free) medicine cabinet of uppers and downers 😁 Lovely to hear a little more about you